Ibimenyetso 8 byakwereka ko wowe n'umukunzi wawe mutazaramya urukundo.

Abahanga mu by’imibanire bagaragaza ko hari imyitwarire wabona ku mukunzi wawe ukaba uretse gushakana na we kuko aba ari ikimenyetso cy’uko umuryango mugiye gushinga ushobora kuzagira ibibazo.
Igihe ubukwe bwegereje wabuhagarikisha uramutse hari ibyo ubona umukunzi wawe agaragaza bitakunyuze aho kugira ngo uzabikore nyuma mwaramaze kubana.
Inkuru ya HuffingtonPost ivuga ko bimwe mu byo abahanga mu mibanire bagaragaje bikunda kuba ku bantu benshi bitegura kurushinga ariko bakumva bizakemuka baramaze kubana.

• Kukurutisha inshuti ze

Igihe ubona ko umukunzi wawe ahindura gahunda mwari mufitanye kugira ngo yigire mu zindi afitanye n’inshuti ze, haba hari ikibazo.
Ntabwo ku bantu bitegura kubana, umwe akwiye kurutisha mugenzi we inshuti cyangwa abandi b’umuryango.
Umuganga witwa Aaron Anderson yavuze ko “Abantu bashyingiranwa ku bw’impamvu zitandukanye ariko ukwiye kumenya ko uwo muntu ushatse ari we ushyira ku mwanya wa mbere, niba atari ko bimeze mutarabana , ubwo nimunabana ntutekereze ko bizaza.”

• Nta kujya inama

Kuganira ku ngingo zitandukanye ni kimwe mu biba bikenewe kugira ngo umubano ugende neza.
Niba mutavugana, mutajya inama ngo mwungurane ibitekerezo, bigaragaza ko utiteguye umubano w’ibihe byose n’uwo mugiye kurushingana.
Umuganga w’indwara zo mu mutwe, Tina Tessina ati “ Ubumwe bukomeza kubura iyo hari ibintu byinshi mutaganiriye cyangwa se ibibazo byinshi mutakemuye ngo biganirweho.”
Yongeyeho ati “Ugomba kubona ko ari ikintu gikomeye, niba ubona mutajya muganira cyangwa mwarabiretse, ni ikibazo. Niba byananiranye wasubika ubukwe kuko n’ubundi biba bitazakunda.”

• Gucana inyuma

Nubwo kumenya ko uwo mwitegura kurushingana yaguciye inyuma nta wakwemeza ko ari ikintu cyatuma mutandukana burundu, ariko igihe mwateguraga ubukwe wafata igihe cyo kubitekerezaho.
“ Nubwo atari buri gihe ariko uwaguciye inyuma akenshi aguca inyuma, mugomba kuganira ku ngamba zatuma bitazongera kubaho mbere y’uko mujya kwihuza .”

• Kutaganira ibyerekeye gutera akabariro

Usanga abantu bakundana uko byagenda kose ingingo y’ibijyanye no gutera akabariro bayiganiraho cyane, akenshi bavuga ku byo bifuza byakorwa bageze mu buriri, ibyo bishimira n’ibyo batishimira.
Anderson ati “ Ibaze niba iyo ngingo mutayiganiraho ubu ngubu, noneho utekereze uko imyaka izakurikira gushyingiranwa kwanyu izaba imeze.”

• Kubatwa n’ibiyobyabwenge

Nubwo ibiyobyabwenge bitatuma utandukana n’umukunzi wawe igihe ubona ko agenda yikosora ariko uba ukwiye gufata igihe ukabigenzura.
Uwabaswe n’ibiyobyabwenge ngo ntabwo apfa kubikira ako kanya, nta nubwo ari ikintu cyoroshye gutandukana na byo. Ababyirengagiza mbere y’uko babana hari igihe ikibazo kibarenga kikarushaho gukomera.

• Umuntu ukirutse indwara ikaze

Ni byiza ko waba usubitse ubukwe ukareka uwo mwitegurana gushinga urugo akabanza agasubira mu buzima busanzwe niba akirutse indwara yamuzahaje cyangwa se niba yaragize ibyago agapfusha ababyeyi kugira ngo abashe kwiyakira.
Susan Pease Gadoua ati “ Kubakira inzu ku butaka bujegajega ni ikibazo, ugasanga umuntu ashyingiwe afite umubyeyi urembye, yamara gukora ubukwe agahita yimuka agasubirayo kumurwaza igihe kirekire.”
Iyi nzobere igaragaza ko biba byiza kuba wasubika ubukwe aho kwihutira kubukora nyamara utari hafi ngo wubake urugo.

• Ibibazo by’ubuzima bwo mu mutwe

Igihe umukunzi wawe agaragaza ibibazo by’ubuzima bwo mu mutwe nk’umunaniro ukabije cyangwa ibindi, wasubika ubukwe akabanza agakira.
Laura Heck ati “ Hari umuntu uba ufite ibibazo by’ubuzima bwo mu mutwe, agashaka umuntu wihariye umukurikirana akamubwira ati ’ndashaka ko nzakira vuba kugira ngo igihe iki n’iki nzakore ubukwe,aba akwiye kwitonda kugira ngo azabukore ameze neza.”
Kuba ubukwe buteza imirimo myinshi mu myiteguro yabwo biteza undi munaniro ku buryo bisaba ko ubujyamo agomba kuba ameze neza.

• Umuntu uguhisha ibijyanye n’umutungo

Bisaba kubwizanya ukuri no kuganira kuri buri kintu cyose, iyo rero uvumbuye ko umukunzi wawe mwenda kurushingana hari ibyo atakubwiye bibyutsa byinshi.
Gutahura ko umukunzi wawe aguhisha ibijyanye n’umutungo, niba ari mu bukene cyangwa arimo amadeni birasenya.
Icyo aba bahanga bose mu by’imibanire bahurizaho, ni uko bisaba kwizerana no kubwizanya ukuri ndetse ahaba hari ibitagenda abantu bakabanza kubikemura aho kwihutira gukora ubukwe ngo bizakemuke nyuma.